you found me how, round 2

I have a confession to make. Okay, so it’s not a biggie confession, but sometimes it’s nice just to get the feelings out there on the table, knowwhatimeanvern? I used to be so paranoid about what I said on the blog, as though the comments I made about running around bra-less would one day be used against me in a job interview or during a bank loan meeting. Or maybe there’d be this stalker who would just love to know all about my trips to the farmer’s market. It was a thing, my worrying. Probably silly, but there you have it.

I know I say the following comment a lot, but it bears repeating. There are some whackadoos out there, folks. And they vote. That is all. While I still have a little anxiety about the creeps lurking on the interwebs, lately I’m enjoying sharing my thoughts with the world, to the point that I actually share them with strangers! Am I a narcissist or an exhibitionist?

I suppose it’s not really a confession to say I like to converse with the outside world, but it feels like one to me somehow. Even looking at the ways random people find my blog has been stranger and more fun than I thought it would be. Below is my second round of “You Found Me How?!,” and it promises to be an even wackier carnival ride of weirdos than the first. Here we go…

1) still wear diapers -cake -cloth -cover -bag -dog -cat

I’m not quite sure what’s happening here. But as it could involve a diaper-covered cat eating cake while a dog in a bag watches, I’m in.

2) adult diaper caddy

Yikes.

3) marie antoinette and her little sister toy story

Ah yes, the headless dolls. Some people have too much time on their hands.

4) little breasts growed

Speaking of bra-less…

I am amused though perplexed by this one, particularly cuz the last time I checked, them lil’ thangs hadn’t growed none. Maybe I need to do more of my Judy Blume exercises. Don’t pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about, ladies. We must, we must, we must increase our bust. Oh Margaret, I’m right there with you, girl. My my, this has become quite the diatribe. You sure know how to hit a lady where it hurts, random Googler.

5) “colorful teeth”

Ummm, yeahhhhh. This scares me. Moving on…

6) area activities cheez its

According to my Google search records, I must be the premier cheez-it expert. It’s a title I’m proud of.

7) “I kid I kid” looney tunes

1 kid + 1 kid = 2 kids = looney tunes. Right you are, Googler.

8) caterpillar stomach ache

Did you eat too many caterpillars? Does your caterpillar have an unexplained stomach ache? I need more details!

9) deep fried cinnamon rolls using rapid rise yeast C’mon, Paula Deen, enough is enough. Do you really need to guild the lily?  10) From now on, you can call me by my street name, “Pink Slime.” McDonald’s recently decided to take pink slime off the menu, so my post got a bazillion hits. I counted. Toodles, ~J Image Credit: Morguefile